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THE NEWSLETTER OF THE DOWEL
February 11 2025
THE WORLD'S MOST POPULAR DOWEL RELATED NEWSLETTER! Praise the Dowel!
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Greetings Dowel fans!
Its your newsletter! The newsletter for all of you decent, hardworking, kind hearted, well meaning, spiritual people - people who wake up every day and subconsciously or not - strive to make the world a better place – through your kindness, integrity and dedication to the Dowel! You know who you are – we thank you! Now, do you know where you are? You are reading the newsletter of the Dowel! Praise the Dowel!
This month! We put a dowel on the blockchain, a smashing update regards the first Dowel pillar box and some big Dowel news! We’ve got so much news this month – lets get on with it!
WHAT MAKES A GOOD HANDSHAKE? AKA - I bought some magic beans!
I was renewing something for the online thing – SSL or something and someone offered to sell me some magical beans and I said yes! All I heard was decentralised, blockchain technology, peer-to-peer network and alternative to traditional domain names – and I was sold - now we own a handshake domain. I have no idea how anyone can access it – and if you could access it you wouldn't find anything there but anyway, we own “Dowel dot 1” I just like saying it… “Dowel dot 1”. These are probably like those little pictures of monkeys that people tried to say had value earlier – but I couldn’t help myself. Its gotta be worth at least what I paid for it right?
"BIG DOWEL" NEWS!
We are back on good terms with the guy who makes our big Dowels. I think both sides are willing to just pretend that the last few email discussions never happened…. Getting back on terms with David (the guy who builds our big Dowels) was a key milestone for achieving our space ambitions. So we are absolutely delighted– although the less he knows about our ambitions the better I think.
After the break!
Still to come - more Dowel news! What happened to the first repurposed phone box, and the return of the Dowel Militia!
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Intermission:
A new study shows that more than 76% of people in the world – believe that Dowels exist. Up from 75% last year.
Praise the Dowel!
ADOPT A PHONEBOX - WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Long term readers may remember (back in May 2024) we reported on how we were repurposing old, seldom used British Telecom phone boxes as free Dowel storage units where anyone who is down on their luck and without a Dowel could find a free Dowel when they needed one. Well… it turns out…
On Tuesday the 4th of February 2025 person or persons unknown drove in to our first Dowel box and completely destroyed it! Yesterday, Monday the 10th, the Dowel Box was entirely removed and today the spot on the pavement where it used to be is covered up by a Lime bike - there is absolutely no clue as to what used to be there.
The Aftermath!
Whilst this is very unfortunate for the people out there who would have relied on this box for their Dowels it does raise some interesting further questions – 1. why on such a slow corner would anyone be going fast enough to smash the Dowel box? 2. It makes no sense – like how??
So, clearly the Dowel was targetted. (I am nodding my head emphatically as write this – it is that significant). So, I think we have no alternative but… to form our own Dowel militia.
ALL NEW DOWEL MILITIA
We are looking for members to form the first Dowel Militia. We can offer successful candidats the following (1) a secret handshake even more secret than the one that ordinary members can read about in their membership pack (2) the promise of potentially maybe, someday – getting a Dowel Militia Pin / pendant. So, if you would like to be considered please answer this hypothetical question:
Q) If a neighbour of yours owns a red early 90s Toyota MR2 (just known as the Toyota MR in France) with a large 2 litre engine and a big fuck off exhaust, and said neighbour likes to rev the engine in the morning really loudly for no good reason… how would you deal with that? Would you:
A: Glue the doors shut like your father taught you (for clarity not glue in the keyhole – just cake the doors in glue…)
B: Buy a scale model replica of the car and post it in pieces through his mail box hoping he will get the idea.
C: Set the car on fire and let nature take care of it.
D: None of the above (tell us what you would do).
Answers on a postcard please (email us at info@PraiseTheDowel.com).
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Skip Google mail, yahoo and hotmail etc - get with the future and have the newsletter send direct to your phone via whatsapp! Use the link below.
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NEXT MONTH
Next month we need your weird updates and other regular features such as Dowel of the Month and members news shoudl return - subject to conditions. ?
Praise the Dowel -
P.
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