Greetings Dowel fans!

Let us prepare our Dowel holes and ready them for another blast of Dowel based information. This is a tribute to the greatest carpentry joint of all time and you... are in for a treat. Praise the Dowel!

This “months” content is contributed entirely by our readership. We discuss how to work out how old your Dowel is, where do baby Dowels come from, view some disturbing magical trousers (you've been warned) and just generally talk about whats got our goat this month – Praise the Dowel!

Where Do Baby Dowels Come From?

Up until now evidence of juvenile Dowels has been extremely elusive and we have only been able to use indirect evidence to speculate on how Dowels come to be.

Below is a photograph from a valued member and citizen scientist showing what we firmly believe to be the best photographic evidence of babys Dowels in existence.



The Citizen Scientist who shared this photo with us (who we shall call "Member A") has the following information to add:

She came across this Dowel whilst cleaning, its from unknown origin – and matches no existing Dowel bearing items in their house….

They have come up with the following theories to explain this:

1. A crow may have left the adorable little Dowel for her to care for.


2. Two adult Dowels got together and loved one another in a very special kind of way and then a short amount of time later - this Dowel suddenly appeared... However, as “Member A” points out this does imply that the baby Dowel was subsequently abandoned and that does NOT seem in line with the way of the Dowel...

How Old Are My Dowels??

We received a query from a very polite man in Belgium – they had recently bought an old rocking horse which they were working to restore. They wanted to get an idea of how old the item was – the rocking horse contained Dowels and after viewing our website they recognised that we must be the worlds top authority and foremost experts on the subject of the Dowel – so they emailed us to ask “how old are my Dowels”.

Naturally we were very happy to help and delighted in telling them all about the remarkable history of the Dowel and how contrary to what many people assume – the history of the Dowel actually pre-dates trees. A fact he agreed was “interesting, although perhaps not especially relevant”.

Pictures of the slightly creepy looking horse are included below - along side Dowels contained within - if you think you can help date these Dowels - then please let us know.

After the break!

Still to come - "thats weird" and whats rankling me right now.

INTERMISSION:

“100% of mental health professionals surveyed say the Dowel is good for your mental health” FACT!

"99% of all Dowel Believers have more self esteem than the equivalent non-believers." Also FACT!

That's Weird

An associate member wrote to us to tell us about a magic pair of pants in Iceland. Its not at all Dowel related but is certainly a bit weird. I think what I like most about the Wikipedia Article is how many variations of the phrase “Devils Breaches” they use.

Image accredited to Bernard McManus from Victoria, BC, Canada - via Wikipedia

NEXT "MONTH" ?

So you may have noticed it has been three months since our last “monthly” newsletter. I think at least for the near term – the newsletter publication schedule will change to “quarterly” or more aptly – “when I have time”.

This is not because I am reducing the amount of time that I devote to the Dowel – but because (1) our assistant has finally had enough – something I put down to Jlo persistently calling her and asking for “recompense” (whatever does she mean by recompense?) further I admit I did keep asking her (our assistant) to get on to Microsoft (the global tech superpower) and demand that they unblacklist our domain… as for some reason every single email we send to any hotmail account is automatically rejected…. If you have a hotmail account and are reading this – its probably because I sent this using my neighbours wifi. Furthermore – our assistant is pursuing “paid work” to which I say – fair enough. Secondly – I will be working on some other methods of communication as its been shown that email is unreliable. The Dowel shall not be silenced – all Praise the Dowel.

In the mean time – feel free to continue emailing the Dowel, we will continue to reply to all enquiries… also, if you would like to contribute to the newsletter - let us know. If you have a hotmail address maybe send us an alternative address we can reach you on etc.

WHERE CAN I SIGN UP FOR THE NEWSLETTER DIRECT TO MY PHONE? ONLY HERE!
THE WHATSAPP CHANNEL OF THE DOWEL!!

Key takeaways:

• Its private (as much as anything from meta is…)
• Your phone number is not shared with me, or anyone else following the chanel. No one can see your deatils.
• Meta probably track you, although they say they dont
• You will find a nice juicy link to the newsletter just as soon as it is released…
• You can sign up and then just completely ignore it no one minds.
• Microsoft cant stop it.
• Its the only place we will be publishing bonus mildly erotic Dowel imagery
• https://www.whatsapp.com/channel/0029VawAffN72WTvMBcXMc3X
  
  So, what are you waiting on? Click the link and join up now!


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